BoWilliams.com

The Acoustic Cafe: where tunes and tyranny intersect

Bo — Fri, 18 May 2012 13:35:00 +0000

Did you know we have an alternative music festival in northern Alabama? The Acoustic Cafe started in 1996, and has recently moved to a site in rural Marion County. It happens again next weekend—May 25 and 26.

I learned of The Acoustic Cafe from a friend of mine. She mentioned it not to tell me about the music, but to entertain me with stories of her attendance experience. You see, festival owner Steve Masterson rules The Acoustic Cafe with an iron fist. The “three-day village of harmony, love, and tolerance” has a whole bunch of rules, and you better follow ‘em, buddy boy:

If you think this is a place where you can come and get wild, we do not want you here. If you had rather talk while sitting in front of the stage instead of listening to music, we do not want you here. If you can’t deal with your trash and recyclables in the proper manner, we do not want you here. If you are one of those people who think you are special and the rules do not apply to you – well, you guessed it – we do not want you here.

Is there a bit of sadistic pleasure in there? Would you believe this guy actually polices the crowd and shushes people?

I thought surely my friend was overplaying it just a little bit for comedic effect. Then, she shared with me email she received earlier this week, from Steve to his list. (The email subject is Now that we got your money.) Quoting:

Well now that we got your ticket money we don’t have to be near so nice to you. You new people need to know a few things, come prepared to take care of yourself. Try to bring as little trash as possible. For instance if you have bought a new air mattress take it out of the box at home instead of throwing the box away up here. It will make it easier on us. DO NOT BRING GLASS. Think how bad it would ruin your weekend if we took you [sic] cooler full of glass bottles. Do what you are told to do by our people when you arrive. Our goal is to get your vehicle parked and settled in.

I think the most telling bit is the directive about the air mattress box. That serves no interest but feeding someone’s freak—as in control.

I have written before of homeowners’ associations, and specifically my belief that they tend to attract people who crave power but have been unable to achieve it in any other area of their lives. It sounds as if dear Steve may have similar cravings (and attendant trouble satisfying them). However, rather than worrying people incessantly about whether their window treatments are white or ivory, he charges them $50 to submit and be berated for the weekend (under the auspices of being a music lover). Hey, give the guy credit for finding an original path through it all.

Tickets are $50 in advance, or $60 at the ~~compound entrance~~ gate. If you’re into alternative music and recreational totalitarianism, it could be just what you should do with next weekend.

Greater Huntsville Music Coalition A longtime net friend of mine has begun a non-profit...
Tunes in this world and that I spent far too much of the afternoon (including, I...
Pandora.com My friend Mark stopped by my office this afternoon to...

Thursday miscellanea #188

Bo — Thu, 17 May 2012 12:32:27 +0000

In an effort to increase Alabama Gulf tourism dollars, the state legislature has mandated a long summer with a late starting date for the upcoming school year. (The logic of this is dubious, even if it were suddenly somehow more important than children’s education.) Many school systems’ calendars, including the one with which I planned our fall vacation, have been in place for months. Alabama, when I can feel Montgomery here, it’s too much. And I promise you’ll pay at the ballot box.
I can’t remember the last time I had an all-you-can-eat buffet (besides a salad bar). Not my thing anymore. But they’re still out there, and shouldn’t they make good? Isn’t this part of the business model—balancing out this guy with little old ladies and such?
As I watched a late-model Mustang exit 565 yesterday, I wondered whether cool turn signals, like the sequential ones on this car, made them more likely to be used. I don’t think anyone’s really doing anything with “motion” like that except this Ford example and Chevrolet with the Corvette, but with the increasingly complex LED arrays that are making up some rear lights, the possibilities are endless. The thing I still haven’t seen that I think would be neat is using the same lens for turn signals and back-up lights. The first-generation Ford Fusion would have been a great candidate for this.
Breaking into ambulances for pain and anti-anxiety drugs. Nice.
I was thinking I’d go with a reprise of a classic look for my niece’s wedding this weekend. Lea was not quite so enthusiastic.
Did you catch Sylvester Stallone in a painting from 1511?
The fourth-best quarterback prospect in the United States has committed to Alabama. Cooper Bateman chose the Crimson Tide over scholarship offers from Arizona, Arizona State, Arkansas, Auburn, Boise State, BYU, California, Colorado, Florida, Maryland, Ole Miss, Purdue, UCLA, Utah, Utah State, and Washington.

Thursday miscellanea #62 It’s not getting better, the more we learn. It’s looking...
Thursday miscellanea #12 I won’t quite own the junkie label, but I’m definitely...
Thursday miscellanea #90 One of Dad’s neighbors just came back from Destin with...

Obama brings a knife to a gunfight

Bo — Wed, 16 May 2012 00:30:00 +0000

Game on!

We have a presumptive nominee, so Obama has begun in earnest. So far, the Obama campaign and allied forces have made sure we know that Mitt Romney put the family dog on top of a station wagon 30 years ago. Also, he was a party to restraining a long-haired feller and cutting his hair in high school, and the guy might have been gay, except maybe none of that was true after all. Or something.

It is perhaps a bit superficially jarring that such seems to be the Obama campaign’s main approach now, most of six months from Election Day. I mean, to the degree that these sorts of attacks are ever indicated, aren’t they best used as “throw-ins,” ancillary to the primary message?

But think about it. What else can Obama do? Talk about all of his kept promises? Trumpet the efficacy of his economic policy? Tell most of America they’re wrong when they consistently say they want Obamacare repealed? Brag about arming drug cartels? Discuss how deftly he handles world leaders in casual conversation? Say “I’m President Obama, who ordered Osama bin Laden killed” again?

See, Barack Obama has something he’s never had before: a record of his performance. This is new to both him and his campaign team. They’ve never had to deal with it before. So far, 1) Show up; 2) Orate; 3) Repeat has been the whole plan—and it’s been enough.

But gee, that’s not working anymore. There’s this pesky little matter of three disastrous years under The One’s leadership.

So it’s straight to the little anecdotes that demonstrate how rotten Mitt Romney is. There’s a problem with the little anecdotes, though. Thanks both to a ceaselessly sycophantic media machine and inept opposition in 2008, Obama’s never had to deal with his own little anecdotes before. The media was all in on the hopey-changey stuff. McCain decided it was beneath him, so he played rope-a-dope with it (except he forgot to win at the end).

But the Romney campaign hits back—quickly. (And poetically. Loved the reiteration of the Dreams from My Father bit about eating dogs.)

So let’s examine what we have here. We all know the level of genuine vetting Barack Obama received in 2008, which went something like: “he’s so inspiring, and he’s the first black president. Get him in there. Ayers? Wright? Chicago-style thuggery? Nothing to see here. Move along.” OK, so we’re playing on this level and comparing these largely unplumbed depths to…

…quite possibly the straightest arrow to run for president in the modern era.

Had a look at this week’s polling?

President Obama to criminalize apathy Michelle Obama is a babe. She’d be, unambiguously, the hottest...
Obama gets tough with the federal budget Obviously deeply concerned about out-of-control federal spending, this morning President...
Obama’s new rhetoric of fear My collegiate mentor and friend Dr. Susan Fillippeli has written...

Saturday at Publix

Bo — Tue, 15 May 2012 03:06:56 +0000

Here are the boys working on Lea’s personalized Mother’s Day cake:

I said to the young woman running this table “wow, you’ve got the best job in the whole store right now, don’t you?” She smiled and said “oooooh, yeah.”

So we stopped at Publix first on Saturday because I was afraid there would be a mob at the greeting cards, and I wanted to get it over with. Wasn’t bad at all. Then it turned out I could get Kohl’s gift cards there too, so I was delighted to cross “driving east on 72 through Madison in the middle of the afternoon” off my list. The custom heart cake capped the visit nicely.

I know I’ve bragged on Publix before, but it’s just an exceptionally run business. It’s a retail experience I can count on not to raise my stress level, and as that’s consistently true of at least three locations with which I’m familiar, I conclude it’s cultural. Good job, folks. Don’t go changin’.

Publix to give away seven antibiotics Come in with a prescription and get a 14-day supply...
Wal-Mart hilariously mystified by its ongoing decline As I type, Wal-Mart is expected to announce its second...
Owning my occasional moronity Frequently (but not always) when I go to Publix, the...

Happy Mother’s Day

Bo — Sun, 13 May 2012 20:27:24 +0000

I’ve not ever been one to observe negative anniversaries or other holidays, so it’s unusual for me to be a little sad on Mother’s Day.

I had dinner with my mother’s widower a year to the day after she died because he called and asked me, and he was still so totaled I couldn’t really say no. But as we sat at the Oxford Red Lobster, he said he wanted to do it every year, and I immediately said I didn’t think that was a good idea. I think it hurt his feelings. I felt bad about that for a while.

Mom’s been gone eleven years now. I miss her mostly in unexpected whispers, but once in a while she clocks me. She clocked me this morning when I was putting up this photo on my Facebook profile. I didn’t expect that to be tearful, and then it was.

I have a childhood friend I haven’t seen in person in more than 30 years, but with whom I have a pleasant and satisfying relationship of correspondence. Her mother is in heaven now too. Days like today, she and I exchange texts and suppose that our moms must be having coffee together.

Happy Mother’s Day. Hug your mom every chance you get.

Herman Cain is done OK, so: I have a female friend for a decade...
Didn’t we already have a lech president? Seems that in addition to the photographer, the French president...
Happy Halloween We were right out of the comics at our house...

The creepiest ice cream truck EVER

Bo — Fri, 11 May 2012 01:21:25 +0000

As soccer practice wound down tonight, a familiar melody began getting louder. Ah, the ice cream man is here! But, uhhh…

Uh, sir? If I may? I don’t think a complex business plan is necessary for this sort of thing. However, you might seriously consider whether your ice cream truck should be an unmarked, windowless cargo van.

(And I swear that thing is sitting there playing “Turkey in the Straw.”)

Cicada ice cream, squelched by The Man The omnipresent, eerie, plausibly-extraterrestrial-sounding racket at work is finally subsiding...
Bates House of Turkey Seems an appropriate time of year to mention one of...
Notes from the road My road warriors continue to impress. They turned in a...

Thursday miscellanea #187

Bo — Thu, 10 May 2012 05:01:05 +0000

Looking forward to giving the air conditioner a break over the next few days. It’s likely to be the last one for a while.
Current top of the Pandora heap for me is Missing Persons Radio.
I just caught all of Roll Tide/War Eagle for the first time last night. You know, they make these shows for everyone else. When you live here, this passion is no more remarkable than the grass or the sky. That’s most of why we think you fans in other places are just precious when you start wondering aloud about what the most intense rivalry in sports might be.
Outlook Express is such crap. It’s technically flimsy and not at all intuitive to use. I think with today’s malfunction Dad’s headed all the way onto Thunderbird, which he’s already using on his other laptop. (Yes, I know: “it’s about time,” but when something works for you, what’s the motivation to change it? I can sympathize with that. I still have this.)
Recently I was discussing Hall & Oates with a friend, and began reflecting on how deceptive memories of their heyday are. You think they had five hits or so. They really had closer to two dozen.
I see Wal-Mart is trying to lure me back into their retail cesspool with steaks, and I really must be right down the middle of the targeted demographic, because I don’t watch a lot of television and I see that commercial all the time. I’ll say the same thing I always say: Wal-Mart, you lost me because visiting your store consistently makes me miserable. Until that changes, I don’t care what’s in there. Got it?
The tablet is fun to have around for this and that, but as a primary tool it’s just not taking for me. For what I do (particularly the writing), I’d just rather have a netbook. The main thing I do on my Kindle Fire is read National Review and Commentary, and I like it for that because I don’t have the paper to get rid of.
Today (well, late this afternoon), Lea and I will have been married 15 years. She is a phenomenal wife and mother, and I am tremendously blessed by our union every day. I love you, Lea!

Thursday miscellanea #161 It’s in public already, but it’s in a comment, so...
Thursday miscellanea #117 Happy Festivus! Nathan’s getting a Guinness Book of World Records...
Thursday miscellanea #182 I’m going to see Kate this morning. I had a cavity...

“Nobody messes with Joe!”

Bo — Wed, 09 May 2012 12:21:31 +0000

I’ve so enjoyed Jonah Goldberg’s column on our truly remarkable vice president Joe Biden.

It’s hard to believe so much weird, nonsensical crap has come out of the mouth of only one person, and rather disheartening to begin entertaining thoughts of “a heartbeat away.”

As I started reading, I said to myself “I hope he gets into Biden’s abuse of ‘literally.’” (I’ve lamented its imminent loss here before.) Sure enough, it’s up almost first—and not just the run-of-the-mill offenses (Obama has the opportunity “literally to change the direction of the world”), but also his fondness for “literally, not figuratively” (to students in Africa: “You are the keystone to East Africa — literally, not figuratively, you are the keystone.”). He seems to just use “literally, not figuratively” as an intensifier. It’s like a mistake of mimicry a high school student would make.

I’d cite a few more examples, but the truth is that everything Goldberg lists is a greatest hit. Biden is gleefully, unashamedly moronic. Go read the piece. Enjoy it for its own sake. But after you do, please also consider one more thing. Think about the prevailing narrative of Dan Quayle—just what “everybody” “knows” about him whenever his name comes up—and ask yourself how powerful media bias is.

The beauty and agony of lost meaning When I count my blessings, one that always lands high...
756* I saw the headline on CNN.com and turned the game...
Hillary kills 300 supporters, loses in Iowa “We had 300 people outside, literally freezing to death,” Senator...

Review: Mad Anthony’s XXXTRA HOT Private Reserve Hot Sauce

Bo — Tue, 08 May 2012 00:42:28 +0000

So I wrote recently about loading up with gourmet hot sauces. I have really enjoyed them. I think my model going forward will be to order once or twice a year, with half “staples” (as I determine them) and half new ones.

I have determined my first staple—a sauce I will always have in stock. It’s Mad Anthony’s XXXTRA HOT Private Reserve Hot Sauce, which is one of original Van Halen bassist Michael Anthony’s sauces. This was one Scott Roberts praised highly, and I heartily concur.

This is thick—thicker than Sriracha, even. It’s only a little thinner than ketchup. Actually, I like this characteristic because it makes it easier to manage. For example, it’s thick enough to use as a dipping sauce without a dedicated container. Just squirt yourself a little pile on your plate, and you’re set. Or, spread it on meat loaf or pork tenderloin without it going everywhere.

Its initial taste is much in the vein of marinara. It’s right at home on pizza, or with a spoonful stirred into spaghetti sauce. I could see downing a lot of it on garlic bread.

The burn is delayed just a few seconds, but when it comes online, you definitely feel it. Thing is, it’s never uninteresting. Accomplishing “just hot” is trivially easy and very boring (and indeed, more than one person has asked me “can you taste anything? or is it just hot?” when it comes to boutique sauces like this). The answer is yes, complex tastes are possible and appreciated, and they’re definitely here in Mad Anthony’s XXXTRA HOT Private Reserve. There’s a big shot of garlic, which is always going to turn me on. There’s also a nice sweetness that pulls up well short of cloying.

This is not a dedicated hot sauce blog, where perhaps things like what I’m about to say are more understood, so here is the explicit announcement: this sauce is very, very hot. If Tabasco roasts your tongue, and/or you think the Taco Bell Fire Sauce is on the bleeding edge, then be careful.

I have been guilty, more than once, of planning a meal to make it especially amenable to using this sauce. It’s that tasty. Like I say, it’ll always be in stock ’round these parts.

9/10

Hot sauce! So I tiptoed into Tommy’s hotsauce.com order at work, my...
The Tabasco Habanero chicken experiment I like hot sauces quite a lot. They’re a great...
A January Saturday in April Nathan and Aaron went to an Easter egg hunt in...

Crashed!

Bo — Sun, 06 May 2012 02:33:20 +0000

Both boys played their hearts out on the soccer field today.

Actually, the most impressive detail in this photo is the gap between them. That’s where Lea was, and that she mustered the finesse to extricate herself without rousing her sons is impressive. She’s about 72 hours from a root canal, and not feeling very chipper.

I hope you’re having a good weekend.

Star light, star bright… It’s 62° outside, and the windows are open. A slight...
More on Obama’s address to public school students The White House web site has published the text of...
The Tea Party movement’s ongoing lesson in practicality “If there is hope, it lies in the proles.” –...